Monday, January 29, 2018

Top Ten Best & Worst Movies - 2017

2017 captivated us with a slue of outstanding films - spanning from action blockbusters to super-hero gems, fairy-tale wonders to refreshing comedies, historical dramas to terrifying horrors flicks, all of which rocked our world.  This year was incredible!  Though, there were a few movies I didn't get to in time - Phantom Thread, The Florida Project, It Comes at Night, Mother!, Flatliners, The Snowman, The Man Who Invented Christmas and Downsizing.  As you can see I missed a few (ahem, or not). Who knows what these two lists would have looked like otherwise. With that said, here are my top picks. Enjoy!


~YOU'RE THE WORST~

I'll take "Lame Book-to-Film Adaptations" for $2000, Alex. I mean, come on! What started off as a cool premise ended with one of the dumbest anticlimactic endings ever. Sure, it had a few cool twists, but all-in-all I was pretty let down... even with my low expectations.




More like 47 Meters down the pooper! GAH. This "Lifetime" movie isn't as smart as you would think and not as cleaver as you would hope. It’s never a good sign when within five minutes of the movie you guess the ending. Predictable and lackluster at best. Next.




Yeah. Like how one can't forget wasting their time and energy on this curb-stopping snooze-fest.  The best thing about this flick is the inevitable episode of How Did This Get Made that will fasho inspire it.



More like Before I Fall into a coma from hitting my head so hard on the back of my seat because this movie is hella weak.  It's dreary in tone and subject, which mirrors the long and drawn out plot. No one is even remotely likable either, and the ending begs the question "I wasted all this time for that?!  I want my money and time back!  Just watch Groundhog Day instead.




Just your typical action-packed blockbuster, only this time around it packs a soggy punch, backed by some laughable acting, weak stunts and ugly wigs. The worst part about this lame-o is the shame of how cool it thinks it really is - sort of like the class dork posing as the class clown. Meh.




Scarlett Johansson works overtime to salvage this dismal Bridesmaids knockoff, which is basically a chick retreat of The Hangover and Weekend at Bernie's.  It's too over the top and warrants very few laughs. 



If you are ever sucked up into an alien spacecraft, and the extraterrestrials offer you a choice between getting probed with their instruments or watching The Cure for Wellness then OK, fine, option B, but still...



If you are about to go over a ledge of a roaring waterfall and someone tosses you a line and shouts, "I'll tow you to shore, but then we have to watch John Wick 2," take the plunge. And I don't want to hear about how you can't swim, either.



Just when you thought the void couldn't get any darker, along comes the sequel to "Fifty Shades of Grey," and it's even lower in intellect than the first. It easily could be titled "The Normalization of Boring Christian Grey." The plot is so scattered it's ridiculous. To call this watchable is fake news. 



In quick fashion, Mae goes from joking about drinking the company Kool-Aid to guzzling it, no questions asked.  We can almost see her brain cells disappear as she buys into The Circle's ever-intrusive game plan. This been-there/done-that plot is outrageously ridiculous, with a dialed-in, anti-climatic, WTF ending ever. GAH.  You're the worst!


~YOU'RE THE BEST~

Disney excels in creating movie worlds, just like this real-life spin on 1990's enchanted animated movie, which charmed us to our core. "A Tale as Old as Time" shines through with flying colors. It's a heart-warming, magical must-see you don't want to miss!

"What do you want to be for the rest of your life, Cogsworth? A man or a mantle clock?"



9.  Wonder
Maybe this little movie isn't solely about a kid who's disfigured, but about whatever you and I choose to see in it.  It's wildly charming and brimming to the rim of profound messages sprinkled throughout. You will laugh, you will cry, you will be amazed, but more than anything this feel-good "wonder" will make your heart soar!


"I think there should be a rule that everyone in the world should get a standing ovation at least once in their lives."



In the midst of all the hard hitting dramas last season, here comes a refreshing, cinematic delight.  It's wildly hilarious with a surprisingly thought-out plot.  Sure, it's a reboot/remake, but whatever, you will be glued to your seat begging for more. Jack Black's portrayal of a teenage girl is both the best part and on-point. I never laughed so hard. But above all, this blockbuster reminds us why we go to the movies to begin with... to be entertained.  You will never have more fun at the movies!

"I can't believe I'm not Instagraming this right now."




The fate of Western Europe hangs on Winston Churchill in the early days of World War II in this straightforward day-by-day depiction of world-changing events. Gary Oldman (one of my favorite actors) wheels the iconic charter vividly to life with such ease you forget it's only acting.  Well done.

"Will you stop interrupting me while I am interrupting you!"




Despite its bleak topic, it's the ever so powerful strength and performances delivered by McDormand, Harrelson and Rockwell (love him, BT-Dubs) that keeps this movie sturdily anchored in a compelling realistic reality.

"It's 'Persons of color'- torturing business, these days, if you want to know. And I didn't torture nobody."



5.  Get Out
At first I wasn't sure what to make of this thriller, but the more it resonated with me the more I came to realize how incredibly outstanding this movie truly is.  It's absolutely brilliant and effortlessly original. It's dark, creepy and full of twits and turns. Heck YES!

"You know I can't give you the keys, right, babe?" 



4.  IT
This little shop of horrors is a masterpiece of cinematic fright. 'It' so effortlessly blends the perfect amount of horror, humor and heart. There's definitely a skillful balance of nostalgic sentiment and hair-raising effects. It does so well paying tribute to the original source without suffocating any of it. Needless to say, fans alike will not be disappointed.

"I'm sorry, who invited Molly Ringwald into the group?"



3.  The Post
Steven Spielberg brings genius to the silver screen, once again, with his absorbing take the country's first female newspaper publisher and a hard-hitting editor. Spielberg offers a tight, lucid and highly satisfying account of the Pentagon Papers from the point of view of The Post. It's surprisingly thrilling and powerful with outstanding acting and direction. Amazing.

"My decision stands, and now I'm going to bed."



2.  Dunkirk
Visually stunning? Absolutely. Monumental? No question. Edge of your seat, gripping? Most definitely! This show-stopping, historical stunner was a real eye-opener with wit, smarts and intense thrills. Not only did it seriously blow our collected minds to pieces, but it met every high expectations we had.  Bravo! This is one movie that most-definitely needs to be seen on the IMAX screen. 

"Men my age dictate this war. Why should we be allowed to send our children to fight it?"



1.  Lady Bird
I can't say enough good things about this dramedy! This heartfelt, coming-of-age story perfectly captures the bittersweet transition from adolescence to adulthood with such ease, awkwardness and realism.  This sweet and quirky film is brilliant on all accounts and had me smiling from ear to ear throughout the entire movie. The effortless flow of character-driven action will both amuse and endear and quite simply make you say you're the best!

"Listen, if your mother had had the abortion, we wouldn't have to sit through this stupid assembly!" 



It was a stupendous year it film, no question. I thoroughly look forward to seeing what 2018 has in store. See ya at the movies!

The floor is now yours! Did your favorite movie of the year make the list? Something I missed? Let me know what your Best and Worst movies of 2017 were in the comment section below.

Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Trailer Park - 2017

Source: YouTube

A big part of Hollywood film is the build-up, which is why it is a common practice to release trailers for trailers these days. Over the years movie trailers have become their own magnificent works of art, reaching new heights and bounds of excellence. Trailers are a huge deal - their popularity is really only second to the movies themselves. Some might even say trailers are better than the real McCoy. And, of course, there are those that are simply the tip of the iceberg. 

So what makes a trailer great? Great trailers "tease" without revealing too much. They build excitement for the movie while giving the audience an alluring taste of the final product. And they always leave you wanting more.


Below are some key ingredients for a great trailer:
1. The two minute mark. Trailers now-a-days can give WAY too much upfront. If by the end you feel you saw the whole movie then what's the point in actually seeing the whole movie? Keep it tight, keep it simple. Less is more. (We're looking at you, The Fate of the Furious) 
2. The set up. Too often trailers give us too much information regarding the plot or not enough. Successful trailers find that sweet spot right in between. 
3. Introduction. If you have a star studded cast, it's easy to get wrapped up in giving everyone face time. Instead, great trailers focus on two or thee characters that will get the audience excited. 
4. Music. Music is crucial! Music evokes emotion and emotion drives movement. If the music genuinely reflects the mood of the movie, you’re golden. 
5. Capture the mood. Great trailers focus on emotion instead of just plot points. It gets the audience excited to enter whatever world they're trying to sell you. 

With a plethora of excellent trailers to choose from it was difficult to pick just ten. However, I feel confident with my selection. In no particular order I give you my Top Ten Best Movie Trailers of 2017.

Honorable Mentions:
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (trailer 1)
The Shape of Water (trailer 1)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (trailer 2)
Black Panther (trailer 2)



Atomic Blonde (trailer 2)
Hailing from one of the best decades of all time, this trailer has it all. Strong female lead, check. Sex, check. Action, check. Fashion, check. Comedic timing, check. Swaggering movie-star attitude, double check. If Mad Max: Fury Road didn't convince you that is a bonafide action star this flick most certainly will. Love. Love. Love.  The soundtrack alone is worth seeing it for. I dig it.


IT (trailer 1)
This little shop of horrors is a masterpiece of cinematic fright. I love how it broke YouTube viewing records as well. Not only was IT the best horror flick of 2017, but this is one of thee very best trailers of 2017. In just over two minutes it manages to delight us with superb storytelling from beginning to end. It's brilliant on all accounts.  It's eerie in tone and subject, with perfect hair-raising music that leaps the audience into a terrifying fun-house, baiting us to see the full movie.  Seriously, this is one of the best trailers ever made. Bravo!


Beauty and the Beast (trailer 3)
The final U.S. trailer for Disney's live-action Beauty and the Beast is easily the best one yet.  A "tale as old as time" that we love so much, whirls us back to a familiar story with  high energy, wrought with emotion. One can't help but feel giddy after seeing this trailer.  It's majestic, it's magical, it's delightful. We know this story. We love this story. And this looks and sounds like the beautiful story we want.


Alien: Covenant (red-band trailer 1)
Too often Hollywood releases a trailer that spells out the entire film. You can pretty much guess every twist and turn here, but all things aside, there’s something extremely captivating about this trailer. It's dark, it's creepy and grabs your attention immediately with 's trademark disturbing monsters. Muting most of the dialogue in place of the moody remake of 'Nature Boy' is a stroke of genius. It gives it an element of romance even I wasn't going to consider seeing  this movie, but after the trailer dropped, it had me doubting my "no way" notions.


Star Wars: The Last Jedi (trailer 2)
You know why this trailer is so good?  Because you've seen it about five bazillion times. But did we really need a trailer to sell this flick? I mean s'rsly, the main purpose of a trailer is to hook you to get you to say "Yeah, I'd see that." They literally could have shown us a black screen with scribbles, accompanied with Star Wars music and we'd still go see this movie... twice. Oh, but the story, the imagery, the music, the oldie-but-goodie actors, the intensity of this entire trailer is what makes this shine so incredibly well. #IDIE


Thor: Ragnarok (trailer 1)
I'm loving the 80's vibe throughout this trailer so, so much! Thor’s reaction to seeing his old friend is pure comedic perfection. Even without the now iconic “he’s a friend from work!” climax, this trailer would still boast one of the best trailers of the year, showcasing the destruction his home at the hands of Hela, Jeff Goldblum’s delightfully weird Grandmaster, and the thundering rhythms of Led Zeppelin’s “Immigrant Song.” Disney/Marvel can't be stopped!


Dunkirk (trailer 2)
What makes this trailer stand out from the rest is the gorgeous imagery, huge dramatic set pieces, and a somber, steady focus of the characters at the center of it all. Whatever the reason, it's great to get hyped for a Christopher Nolan film. That ticking time-clock throughout this entire trailer is perfection!  This trailer captivates like no other. One of the purest cinematic delights of 2017. 



Blade Runner 2049 (trailer 1)
I'm not the biggest fan of sequels done some 30 years later, especially when it seems like it was only made to fill the canteen of die-hards. But all things aside, it's hard not to fall in love with the craftsmanship of this trailer.  The vibrant colors, the blaring music and visuals are absolutely stunning. Whatever you might think of the movie this stand alone trailer is one gorgeous piece of art.  It's rich and seductive. It's  like watching an oil painting burst to life. But above all, it feels dutifully reverent to the original.


Tomb Raider (trailer 1)
Mystery and adventure made the first trailer for  's Tomb Raider an all out action-packed show-stopper.  Love the high intensity, the heavy beats mixed the smooth rhythmic tone throughout. It's all backed by the famous strong, badass female that we all know as Laura Croft. From beginning to end, this two minute plus trailer has you screaming for me.  Well done.
Release date: March 16th


Quiet Place (trailer 1)
One of my favorite celebrity couples is finally starring in their first film together where they actually play husband and wife. But warning, this isn't a romance.  This trailer is a prime example of less is more. At first you don't know what is going on, but as time ticks on you discover there's so much more beneath the surface. It does a superb job baiting us, calling out to us to see this flick. I love how it gradually builds to a rip-roaring climax. It begs the question on everyone's mind, "who the heck are these monsters?!"
Release date: April 6th



Trailer editing is very much a work of art and when done right it's a thing a beauty! The end product can motivate, captivate and generate major buzz-feed. Was there a particular trailer in 2017 that you remember being wickedly-awesome? Feel free to share your opinions in the comment section below...

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Tomb Raider Trailer

Source: Firstshowing

It's time to meet the new Lara Croft! Warner Bros just debuted their first official trailer for Tomb Raider.  This is a new remake based on the popular video game series. While I cringe at the thought of any remake these days, this one actually looks pretty rad. The ever so lovely and gorgeous, Swedish actress stars as the adventurous Lara Croft. She plays a young woman living in London who travels to a mysterious island in an attempt to figure out what happened to her eccentric father. As expected, there is a tomb she raids while loads of other crazy events ensue. 

The full cast includes Hannah John-Kamen, Walton Goggins, Dominic West, Daniel Wu, and Alexandre Willaume. This is an awesome follow-up to WB's Wonder Woman about another ass-kicking, independent, fierce woman. I love how Hollywood is throwing more love to strong female leads! And I am 'such' a huge fan of Alicia Vikander! I just hope this movie is as cool as it looks. Check out the 'Becoming Lara Croft' video in addition to the action-packed trailer below. She looks absolutely cut in this blockbuster. Good lord! #inspiration Enjoy!...

 
Tomb Raider is directed by Norwegian filmmaker , of the films The Wave, Escape, Magic Silver, and Cold Prey previously. The screenplay is written by . Warner Bros will unleash Tomb Raider in theaters everywhere on March 16th, 2018.
 

Monday, September 11, 2017

IT Review

Being such a fan of Stephen King's work, it's safe to say 'IT' is easily one of his finest yet frightening novels to date. Upon hearing they were remaking this classic I immediately rolled my eyes. "Another day, another remake." I was such a fan of the '90s TV mini-series, I was worried they would ruin it (haha, get it?)Re-watching it now it's nothing short of hokey. It's more goofy than terrifying, with really bad acting. However, there's a whole generation scarred to death of clowns thanks to Tim Curry's portrayal of Pennywise the dancing clown. 

When children begin disappearing in the small town of Derry, Maine, a group of young teens, dubbed "The Losers Club" face their biggest fears when they square off against an evil clown named Pennywise, whose history of murder and violence dates back for centuries. The R-rated feature film, directed by , hits movie theaters just in time for a whole new generation to develop a healthy fear of murderous clowns in red and white face paint. 

Switching it up a bit, the '80s references now replaces the '50s touchstones from the novel. Yet it follows the source material with a smooth rhythm of control. This movie definitely surpasses my high exceptions. Dividing the film into two chapters is a stroke of genius! The first half told when they are kids, and the second half to be told when they are grown-ups. Brilliant! This horrifying flick is dark and moody.  It's fun and entertaining, with loads of thrilling jump-scars to feed your fancy, but it's also surprisingly soulful when you least expect it. The chemistry between the young teens is endearing and sweet, not to mention hilarious at times. And the gorgeously talented 's take on Pennywise, the shape-shifting clown, proves fresh yet evil, terrifying yet engaging. In fact he is so charismatic you miss him when he's gone. 

'It' so effortlessly blends the perfect amount of horror, humor and heart. There's definitely a skillful balance of nostalgic sentiment and hair-raising effects. Needless to say, fans alike will not be disappointed. Go. See. IT.
RATING: A-

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Summer Blockbuster Hotties - 2017

Summer movies return to the blockbuster scene yet again and this time there's definitely no shortage of hotties to wet your tongue. I'm pretty sure there's more to life than being really, really, 'really' ridiculously good looking, but not here. Here, you will see Hollywood serving up some sizzling HOT realness of outrageous proportions. And with these fine babes of toy-land infiltrating our movie theaters this summer it's going to be hard to stay away. Caution: May cause third degree burns.




~Mouth-Watering Bombshells~

Alicia Vikander 
It's hard to fully resist this incredibly sexy, Oscar award winning starlet. This sparkling diamond, of Swedish descent, is a total babe, and has proven she's a force to be reckoned with. Check her out in Tulip Fever, out August 25th. It's a story about an artist who falls for a young married woman while he's commissioned to paint her portrait during the Tulip mania of 17th century Amsterdam.

Up Next: Sisters in conflict traveling through Europe toward a mystery destination in Euphoria, out sometime later this year.


Gal Gadot
There is something mysterious that surrounds this exotic mouth-watering, bombshell, and it has everyone fully intrigued! The calm, cool and collected actress is without question irresistibly stunning. She blew our minds away as the ever-so-powerful super-hero in this summer's epic-hit Wonder Woman, which happens to be one awesome blockbuster. Is it any "Wonder" this Israelian beauty made the cut?

Up Next: Reprising her role as Diana Prince / Wonder Woman in DC's Justice League, out November 17th.  




Cara Delevingne
Freaky-deaky, silly-billy, fierce Cara-Cara-Cara is one of my all time favorite supermodels.  This stunning, sex-kitten oozes sex appeal whether she's on the cat-walk or on the silver screen.  One thing's for sure, this blonde vixen is making quite a splash in Hollywood. Be sure to check her out as she fights the dark forces of evil in Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, out July 21st.  She also has a small role in Tulip Fever as well. 

Up Next: As far as modeling, I'm sure it'll be sexy AF, but when it comes to her acting chops she's currently filming Life in a Year. A story about a 17 year who finds out his girlfriend is dying, so he sets out to give her an entire life in the last year she has left. 




Zoe Saldana
This enchanting beauty of Dominican and Puerto Rican ancestry, is absolutely one sexy-licous knock-out! How can you not adore everything about her?! She's practically perfect. But this mom of three doesn't get by on those vapid hot-chick roles alone. Opting instead, to play a pirate, an assassin, a blue 'alien', all the way to her latest butt-kicking role as Gamora in this summer's monster-hit Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, currently in theaters. If you haven't see it yet... what are you waiting for?!

Up Next: She's currently filming Avengers: Infinity War, where she'll reprise her role as Gamora.  It's scheduled for release next summer.


Charlize Theron
As a rule, I would say most men want to date her, while most women want to be her. This long-legged, gorgeous, bombshell exudes confidence and strength in everything she does. With her vivacious sex appeal, those piercing, stunning blue eyes, and that deep husky voice, it's no wonder people all over the world are drawn to this sex-siren.  Watch this undercover MI6 agent kick a little boo-TAY in Atomic Blonde, which lands in theaters July 28th. 

Up Next: A political journalist tries to hook up with his old babysitter, who now holds an important government position in Flarsky. Out sometime next year.







 
~Lip-Smackin Man-Candy~

Hubba-Hubba!  They sure know how to grow 'em gooooood across the pond. The 37 year British babe is one absolute hunk! He's 'fasho' one delicious piece of lip-smacking, man-candy and an excellent addition to our summer blockbuster hotties. He seems so charming which definitely adds to his sex appeal. That tender, humble smile will easily render the ladies helpless in a matter of seconds. Don’t miss this eight-pack-toting, sexy, heart-throb breathe new life into an old classic in King Arthur: Legend of the Sword, which already entered theaters May 12th. 
Up Next: He plays a prisoner detained on a remote island who plots his escape in Papillon. Which happens to be a 1973 remake.
Oh baby!  Break me off a piece of that yum-yum, chocolate chip, honey-hip...  This devastatingly, gorgeous tall drink of water has got it going on! With that naughty body that just won't quit, this 6'2" beef-cake has everyone drooling. You make me wanna shoop! You don't wanna miss him in what is bound to be a rad sci-fi series either. The Dark Tower hits theaters everywhere August 4th.  He can be my 'gunslinger' any day. 
Up Next: He has two other movies hitting the scene later this year: The Mountain Between Us, out October 6th and Thor: Ragnarok, out November 3rd.  Boy be on fire!! 
He has this kind of charismatic and extremely sultry way about himself that one can't quite quantify or analyze.  It has to do with a sincerity and a clarity that makes you see something good in him. Which is undeniably fierce and sexy.  Aside from being blessed genetically this Irish born talent will blow your mind in this summer's drama The Beguiled, which storms theaters June 30th. Don't miss out!
Up Next: He will star in Tim Burton's live-action remake of Dumbo, out sometime next year.


Three words: DEE-LISH-US. Damn, this 27 year old, brown-eyed, stunner from down under is sure to make the lady-folk weak in the knees.  I mean c'mon!  This tall, dark and handsome, "boy-next-door" type has got it made!  And while this sex-on-a-stick isn't exactly a house-hold name he's bound to be soon enough. He proves he can play with the big boys too, staring alongside Johnny Depp and Jeffrey Rush in Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, in theaters now.  Don't miss this him make a Caribbean splash.
Up Next: He will star in Office Uprising, which is an action/comedy about an employee at a weapons factory who discovers that an energy drink turns his co-workers into zombies. Due for release later this year.

This handsome looker has both sexes drooling over those breathtaking baby-blues and that lip-smackin hottie-body! He's definitely a thing of beauty and embodies style and grace with the up-most confidence and humility. I feel safe in declaring him one of our national treasures. There's little doubt Hollywood and the entire world are a better place thanks to his presence. Not only did he woo the general masses, but he stole the heart of our beloved Diana Prince in Wonder Woman, currently in theaters and taking the box office by t'town.
Up Next: He will star in A Wrinkle in Time, which is a film about the aftermath of the disappearance of a girls father and how these three peculiar beings send them into space in order to find him.

All the sizzling babes in this segment turned K-Rated's hotness dial up to... 11.  What can I say, 2017 means bidniss! Don't believe me? Check out this movie mash-up highlighting all the goodies summer blockbusters have to offer.  Enjoy! 
The floor is now yours. Share some of your favorite Summer Blockbuster Hotties of 2017 in the comment section below. 





powered by: