Friday, April 1, 2016

Top Ten Movies We Wish Were April Fools’ Day Jokes

Source: YouTube

Here is a list of the sorriest movies in recent cinema. Like any art form, film can be rather subjective. What one finds horrible the other might love. And there are movies out there that are so ridiculously stupid they actually end up being pretty awesome - these are called Cult Classics. But 'here' we have a list of movies that are simply so bad we wish they were jokes Hollywood played on us on April Fools’ Day.  Instead they just played us for fools.  Take a look...

Dishonorable Mentions:
Junior (1994)  
Jupiter Ascending (2015)
Aftermath (2012)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) 

10. Catwoman (2004)

Yep. She's 'actually' an Oscar award-winning actress. (shakes head)

9. Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999) 
Ever wondered what Darth Vader was like as a kid? No? OK.

8. The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997) 

Yeah. Let's "out-smart" the dino with a little "fancy" gym routine. (thumbs up)

7. That's My Boy (2012) 

"Everyone in this room is now dumber for having [watched] it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

6. Elektra (2005) 
Wow. I sure wish I had the last two hours of my life back.

5. Spider-Man 3 (2007)
There are few things we wish we could un-see. That emo Spider-man dance... thing? is one of them.

4. Lady in the Water (2006) 

M. Night Shyamalan?... The answer's in the question.

3.  Jack and Jill (2011)
I kinda wish would give dramatic acting another shot. 

2. Twilight (2008)
 I. Just... Can't.

1. Batman & Robin (1997)

Bat credit card, bat nipples... 'nough said. (rolls eyes)

Sometimes Hollywood spits out a movie so bad it's hard to ignore, and the aforementioned films are no exception. These insufferable bores failed to excite, thrill, captivate and entertain. In fact, the only thing these films 'do' produce is a rancid stench of horrible buzz-feed. Sure, there may be WAY worse movies out there, but for all the hype and anticipation 'these' movies received it's no wonder we all gagged. But as horrific as these movies truly are they still managed to gross more $money$ than I'll see in a lifetime. The madness.

Remember, no list is ever definitive. As long as the industry keeps pumping garbage to the masses this list will constantly be changing. But in the meantime, feel free to share your own picks in the comment section below.


Troy said...

Ha! I own 9 out of 10 of those movies. I think I may have a problem!

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